To kick off the new website, I thought I'd track down our old friend Mr. Cho, to see if he might be willing to lend his unique voice once again to the Pinback's Web Central franchise, and get this place rolling.
After several calls to various information services in south Florida, I was finally able to get a hold of his number and give him a ring. Though I am not able to offer an audio recording of the call, we are more than proud to present to you the following transcript:
PWC4: Hello Mr. Cho, thank you again for joining us!
Thanks again to Mr. Cho, and welcome to Pinback's Web Central 4!
CHO: [...various shuffling, bustling noises in background...]
PWC4: Mr. Cho?
CHO: [...indecipherable...] Ya hold on a... [...static...] that goddamn thing outta here! I on da phone widda goddamn website!
CHO: Ya, goddammit. I here. Who dis?
PWC4: Hello, this is Pinback's Web Central, and we're here with our old friend Mr. Cho, for our very first Introduction for the latest iteration of the site. Mr. Cho, how are you today?
CHO: Ya, ya, get on widdit! I gotta lotta goddamn booshit to deal wit ova here. Shit!
PWC4: Mr. Cho, it's been many, many years since we last spoke. What have you been up to during all this time?
CHO: Oh, well, lessee, first I sell da restaurant and then go all ova da goddamn country trying to find myself and moan about how horriboo my rich white fucking asshole life is, take a lotta depression pill, then start a goddamn dumb website widda buncha booshit about mindful and shit. Whadda fuck you think I been doin? Same goddamn thing as before, serving beef and fucking broccoli to fat drunk asshole American who too lazy to pick up a goddamn fry pan! You still askin the dumbest goddamn question. Okay, asshole, here a question for you: how many goddamn website you gonna start this month? How many times you gonna try to start this same dumb goddamn stupid dumb Pinback website too? You plan on doin anything widdit or you just like sitting there on GoDaddy pulling your goddamn tiny American dick in one hand while click on da "register domain" button widda otha? How bout dat for a goddamn question. Why you call me for this booshit anyway? Fuck dis website booshit! Fuck you! Shit!
PWC4: How has business at the restaurant been lately?
CHO: How da fuck business been? How business been, well, lemme think about dat one. Less do some Silver Panda math, okay? Pork lo mein equal six fifty. One dumb fucking asshole American with grease roll down his mouth cuz his fat pork arms are too thick for him to lift a goddamn napkin to his fat fuck face equal three hundred pound. So six fifty, times three hundred, equal fuck you. Dats how business is. Anymore booshit question for me or we done here?
PWC4: Well, this is the first Introduction for the new website, so as we start the PWC journey anew, is there a message you'd like to get out there to the readers?
CHO: Ya, okay, how bout dis: Unless you in West Palm Beach and wanna get fucking dinner special for four for your fat ass family's face, get the fuck outta my face and fuck you, cuz I don't give a goddamn about stupid fucking website booshit, and I hope a goddamn bus runs over your computer, your cat, your whole fucking dumb goddamn house. Never call dis number again! Fuck! [...click...]